romance ecards

About this category

Where would we be without romance? Probably living less dramatic lives with more compatible people and much more realistic expectations. The only reason our range of Romantic wrongcards exists is because when people start to get themselves into a romantic mood, all good judgment evaporates. And that's where we come in. So if you are going all dewy-eyed and gaga about a certain special somebody then you might as well kick-off the relationship with a Greeting Card that is wrong. Because it's always good to scale back their estimation of you and get them used to feeling a little disappointed. It's only fair. Subcategories of our Romance Cards include: flirting cards, valentines day cards and, hopefully if you make it this far, cards for anniversaries.

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Most recent romance ecard

trite valentines ecards

I was in love once. It was an earth-shattering experience, a state of instant infatuation. As soon as I tasted that vanilla bean ice-cream cone I fell head over heals. Then, in that moment of ecstasy, some really annoying girl came up and asked for a taste. This is where the story gets bad. Turns out, she liked vanilla bean ice-cream too. You know what she does? She sits down right next to me and starts to take turns eating my ice-cream (!) And smiling at me in a simpering sort of way (!) Well, long story short, I only got to eat half of that ice-cream cone. But it was love that I felt for that ice-cream, I am sure of it. Makes me sad to remember, actually. Sigh. That's love for you, I guess.
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valentines day reciprocity valentines ecards

Here is your Valentines Day card. Now it is your turn to do something for me. Vaseline.
Some companies profiteer from war. Others profiteer from love. Which is worse? Here at Wrongcards™ we like to ask the hard questions. Like - is our company guilt-tripping you with stupid made-up holidays? Or are we culture assassins engaged in a war on savagery and kitsch? The answer to that question is really up to you. Or, rather, our lawyers, who very boringly overruled this slogan idea for our website: 'Wrongcards: The Halliburton of Ecards'.
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cardioid romance ecards

I'm an acknowledged expert in a couple of fields - it's only modesty preventing me from telling you which. But I will say that my as yet unpublished tome 'The Psychology of Wasps and Wasp-like Invertebrates' puts me among the greatest scientific minds of our age. I just need to secure a publisher (the hardware store won't sell me any zip-ties). Oh, I'm also an expert on romance. I'm such a renaissance man.
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badgered valentines ecards

I was hoping you guys would be cool this year and, in some unspoken way, universally recognize that Valentines Day is a lot of nonsense. I could have played video games today, guys; it could have been good. But no - here we are, I'm drawing badgers because some of you are dating people who believe in this stuff. I'm not angry with you. But let's see some progress next year ok?
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inflatable pony romance ecards

Romance is dead, they said - but I found out where they buried it. Now it's safely hidden under my bed. Don't worry, it only smells when I get it damp.
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new level romance ecards

As you know I'm determined to rescue romance from a culture saturated in half-measures and moderation. Everyone needs a mission I suppose. And maybe it's because I'm from privilege, having been raised on up-market cat food by Nanna in a caravan in South-East Queensland, but I find myself wanting to give back to society. So - if this card doesn't help you, you must be very lost.
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still want you anniversary ecards

I want you to know that I would still want to be with you even if I COULD lick my own genitals.
Romance today is all about half-measures. It's gotten so bad that boys don't even steal flowers from graves any more, they just buy 'em in a shop. That's like saying 'I'll do anything to win and retain your affections provided it's convenient and lawful'. Once, lovers red-lined their emotions well into the realm of corpse desecration. But its ok, Romance can be saved; Wrongcards is taking it back!
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elephants anniversary ecards

Anniversaries are great. If you can keep someone from working out who you truly are for an entire year then you deserve a bit of a romantic celebration. Sadly it is becoming increasingly customary these days to spend your anniversary with your partner and not with prostitutes, but traditional values will come back into vogue, don't worry. Another war will see to that.
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flirting usercard

This is how I like to imagine you.  Except not as a baby, of course.
by the blue raja
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sheep romance ecards

If God didnt want me to practice on you he would have given me a sheep farm.
I know many of you hope one day to find a special someone with an excellent credit history and maybe go in on a thirty-year fixed-rate mortgage together. I too am a romantic. But romance isn't just about money - there's a biological aspect to it too. If you don't send today's card to a potential co-mortgage signatory then you'll never have any offspring to fight about in court. I'm here to help.
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next thing to try flirting ecards

Now that we have done everything else, the next thing I would like for us to try is foreplay.
Let's say you're romantically involved with a balloon animal. Society doesn't understand - it never does - and you have to sneak out to this one Italian restaurant where the staff aren't all that judgmental. Now one night, over a candlelit dinner, she wafts across the table and touches the candle flame. Pop! She's dead! Do you tip the waiter for one meal or two?
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