Logo
Postcards-banner
  • Blog
  • Home
  • holiday
  • just because
  • concern
  • celebration
  • romance
  • birthday
  • congratulations
  • baby
  • wedding
​

baby ecards

When a new baby comes along there's a lot of screaming and blood and some doctors laugh all the way to the bank. Most of us seem to find the experience of being born so traumatic that we've forgotten it within a few short years. But society likes its conventions and one such convention is sending baby cards to new parents. So here you go.
1 2 Next › Last »
  • If you don't like your first-born, it's useful keeping him or her around because it can be useful in supernatural transactions.

    transactions

    baby

  • Congratulations on your new baby. I'm sorry it's probably not the gender you wanted but you can always love it slightly less. Don't worry I won't tell anyone.

    fifty fifty

    baby

  • Don't worry I'm happy to babysit. You can pay me in breast milk. I have a lot of pleasant associations with it.

    pleasant associations

    baby

  • I was going to bring your new baby gold, frankincense and myrrh but I remembered how badly that can turn out.

    december baby

    baby

  • I'm sorry I cannot babysit your child but I suffer from a debilitating phobia of orange-colored excrement.

    debilitating

    baby

  • I'm not saying you have a parasite growing inside of you. I'm saying it's much worse than that.

    parasites

    baby

  • In fairness to myself, the only reason I don't want to hear all about your pregnancy is because I think the process is icky.

    fairness to myself

    baby

  • Congratulations on the birth of your baby, if indeed it IS your baby and not the baby I read about on the back of my milk carton.

    milk baby

    baby

  • Placenta should never go to waste.

    old fashioned advice

    baby

  • Aside from the fact that, generally speaking, your baby has poor personal hygiene and is lazy, incoherent, unmotivated, self-absorbed, and hogging all the attention, I think the child has a lot to recommend it.

    lazy and unmotivated

    baby

  • A 'baby' card with the text: Statistical fact: some babies grow up to be mass murderers.I'm not saying it's going to happen in your case - I'm just pointing out that you're playing Russian Roulette with statistics.

    statistical russian roulette

    baby

  • I am sorry your child is crap at drawing. SEE? the perspective is all off ...

    childrens art critic

    baby

  • I am sure your baby is going to be more special than all the other babies in the world, and that this is not some trick of evolutionary psychology to keep you from ever forgetting where you last put it.

    all babies are special

    baby

  • Let's get this out of the way now: I will not be interested in hearing about your child until it grows into something more interesting. Like an arsonist.

    something more interesting

    baby

  • Congratulations on your New Baby! You have just scored two decades of economic servitude preparing a young mind to live unaided in a troubled, neurotic world.

    economic servitude

    baby

1 2 Next › Last »
About Wrongcards

Offering free ecards that are wrong for every occasion, Wrongcards.com is possibly the most curious greeting card site on the web. Here you will find cards with a unique freshness and originality, which have been lovingly inked on fresh parchment by an emotionally mature artist committed only to the causes of good taste and judgment. Read more here.

Some Links
  • Contact us
  • Complain about us
  • Get us banned
  • Shop
  • Terms
  • Privacy
  • RSS Feed
  • @twitter
Buy Buy Buy

But we'd like to mention that buying our stuff will not make you cool: you are already cool. You don't need to impress your friends: we're already impressed. With that disclaimer out of the way, we do sell packs of cool wrong postcards over at Amazon. They're not very suitable to send to people but that's kind of the idea here.

Every Couple of Months...
..we send out a deeply frivolous newsletter.
© Copyright 2008-2012 Wrongcards.com. All Rights Reserved.
Tell People About Us

Or parts of the artist's soul will die.