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Ecard text: I dont blame you for anything, other than my inexplicable phobia of vampire geese.
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Read my latest book

"Shea is beginning to think that stealing the world's most famous skull wasn't the best way to launch his career in cat burglary..."

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The Harvard Skull Fiasco is Now Available

There's a new book out in the world, and I wrote it.

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Thinking Of You cards

Ecard text: One easy way to 'blend in' is to never be overheard speculating about what the hell it is that the squirrels are secretly up to.
People, January 21 is National Squirrel Appreciation Day in North America. Squirrels are going about under-appreciated, and it's a crying shame. I was twenty-four when I saw my first squirrel and never since that day have I been completely oblivious to them. Let us join together in support, and paranoia, of squirrels.
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WTF cards

Ecard text: No matter how lonely you get never turn to sheep. They are very disappointing, emotionally, even though they squirm nicely.
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Excuses cards

Ecard text: 'Very soon I will think of something offensive to say that will cause three hours of bitter argument, followed by a solid half hour of make-up sex. (Note: I dont have anything yet, other than some fairly controversial views about geese).'
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Get Well cards

Ecard text: I suspect you have caught the Swine Flu and it's your fault because I warned you to wear a condom and you didn't listen.
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