Jewish Ecard with text: hope you have a great jewish holiday. but im sorry your messiah isn't very punctual.

15 Oct 2008

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Jesus birthday

I'm kind of a Spiritual Expert. Answers to big theological questions, like, 'how much eggnog should ideally be consumed with a vindaloo curry', or 'which house is the easiest to steal a Christmas tree from' are easy for me. And I'm good at Christmas too; I love setting deer traps on the roof, I love putting out cookies and absinthe for Santa. BTW when Jesus comes back I'm sending him this card.

Christmas

Passover Ecard with text: Passover is the only part of the year in which you are allowed to throw buckets of lamb's blood at people's front doors without them accusing you of being a sociopath.

spring tidings

Now, I may not know anything about the world's religions but I don't like to think that it should prevent me from forming deeply held convictions on the topic. My Nanna taught me from the earliest age that only a few of us will be saved from the earth by lizard-people in flying saucers, so your guess is as good as mine. So Happy Passover (and Happy Dragon-Egg Festival, Nanna)!

Passover

Jewish Ecard with text: Dear Jewish person, I agree to be your friend on the condition that you at least TRY not to kill Jesus when he comes back.

just try

The only reason Wrongcards has not officially endorsed a religion is because we haven't yet received a sponsorship offer. My hope is that we'll be sponsored by Christianity though I don't know much about it other than its founder was a tall, bearded, blue-eyed guy with North-American good looks. Still, his followers seem to be pretty heavily-armed, which I think is pretty persuasive really.

Jewish

Easter Greetings Ecard with text: To truly celebrate Easter in the traditional way we must first locate an unorthodox thinker who challenges the status quo and then nail him to some planks.

traditional easter

Today is Good Friday. I don't know what Good Friday is about because I haven't read the Bible yet but I have, of course, discerned that there was a lot in the Bible about how much Jesus liked chocolate eggs. If I was a messiah everyone would be setting fire to clowns, then sitting about eating pudding afterwards. But chocolate eggs are okay I guess.

Easter Greetings

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