Workplace Ecard with text: If youre crazy, here, youll be given a straight-jacket. But if you re REALLY crazy youll be given more money, promotions + power! WOOT!

17 Aug 2008

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fear of failure

'I no longer work in an office environment: people couldn't handle my realness. It's a pity because I really enjoyed it, especially 'Mysterious Fire Mondays.' I miss the middle-management types, mostly. I miss seeing the good-natured fear in their eyes whenever I visited their houses late at night to remind them that 'everybody sleeps sometime'.

Workplace

ears

I like to think of myself as someone who can get along with anybody except for clowns, bureaucrats and werewolves. But filling out forms with a pen is, uh, mental torture. Forms make me agitated. I scribble, panic, weep. I yell lots about 'not wanting to live in this plane of reality'. Anyway. I had to fill out a form today. You can kinda tell, can't you?

TGIF

simulating

I had a responsibility once. Most harrowing four minutes of my life. When the old lady came back and thanked me for minding her groceries I was covered in a dread-laden sweat. I don't need to learn a lesson twice - I've been skirting responsibilities ever since. So even though I want to be an inspiration to you all, I can't teach you this stuff. Have you guys SEEN a calendar? Stressful...

Reminders

rich inner life

'People say to me: Kris - how do you do it? I say 'hard work and nothing more'. But the truth is that everything pretty much depends on Human Resources not paying too much attention to me. Happy Friday you lot.'

TGIF

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