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elephants

Anniversaries are great. If you can keep someone from working out who you truly are for an entire year then you deserve a bit of a romantic celebration. Sadly it is becoming increasingly customary these days to spend your anniversary with your partner and not with prostitutes, but traditional values will come back into vogue, don't worry. Another war will see to that.

WTF

WTF Ecard with text: It is better that garden gnomes are not real, for I should have no choice but to spend all my years teaching them to meaning of fear.

gnomes and fear

Increasingly I allow myself to be persuaded that garden gnomes are probably not real - because somehow it seems to matter to the people around me - but the fact is their existence still doesn't make a lot of sense. Why would somebody intentionally make garden gnomes? And why isn't the government doing anything to stop them? And when did we all decide not to ask these questions?!

WTF

WTF Ecard with text: If garden gnomes are not secretly alive, how do you explain the little bastards moving around when we're not looking?

gnomes live

Even though I've played every Grand Theft Auto game to death, the Commonwealth of Massachusetts still refuses to issue me with a driver's license. And while I will concede that I don't know how to drive a car, why are they singling ME out?! Whatever. I'm over it. If you ever ride public transport in Boston and hear an Australian guy talking about garden gnomes, come over and say hi...

WTF

probably really like you

The thing about eels is that they really are impossible to feel neutral about. You might think you like them a lot, say, when you're eating them in a Japanese restaurant. But face to face with them in an ocean, you will have one just thought - that thing is so ugly it is practically anathema.

Flirting

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