WTF Ecard with text: This lizard ate all my weed, turned blue and started talking about Jesus. Best night of my life. Ever.

15 May 2008

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when im high

It's that time of year when we all remember our mothers. That's right. Mothers Day is nigh - at least, it is in North America. Different countries tend to celebrate Mothers Day at different times of year. I know, right? Why can't the world just agree on one thing? It's like we were all brought up badly or something. Anyway. This card has 25% more good taste than the others.

Mother's Day

Workplace Ecard with text: I am sorry about how I acted at work but in my defense I was pretty stoned most of the day. i did take the time to do some pretty wicked origami though.

just stoned

'On Wednesdays I like to post a slightly older card and then I invariably I do something practical, like my taxes. I always put a dead bird into the envelope I send to the IRS - when they call me up about it I say it was an accident. FYI: federal employees are not paid enough to audit people who accidentally mail dead animals to them. I'm here to help.'

Workplace

evidence

I never like to hear people arguing about religion because that means they're not sitting there listening attentively to me. Everyone has a different approach to religious debate. Mine is to scream: That Is Anathema! until everyone leaves. I guess it's important to win.

Dark Humor

everything is fine

I find people very demanding. 'Do this, do that, be quiet, don't eat my pudding, put down that knife, tie it off with a tourniquet, drive me to a hospital, what do you mean we're stopping to buy ice cream?' Today's card? Send it to anyone and they'll probably just GIVE you their pudding. It's only reasonable, really.

Excuses

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