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WTF Ecard with text: the more stoned i get, the more awesome ducks become
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7 Apr 2008

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Mother's Day Ecard with text: Don't worry Mother. When I'm high I love you at least twenty-five percent more than usual. It just accentuates everything!

when im high

It's that time of year when we all remember our mothers. That's right. Mothers Day is nigh - at least, it is in North America. Different countries tend to celebrate Mothers Day at different times of year. I know, right? Why can't the world just agree on one thing? It's like we were all brought up badly or something. Anyway. This card has 25% more good taste than the others.

Mother's Day

WTF Ecard with text: The fact that elephants are expected never to forget anything can make impending anniversaries for male elephants profoundly stressful, and been shown to lead to anxiety, depression and drug use. This elephant (pictured) is addicted to tranquilizers.

elephants

Anniversaries are great. If you can keep someone from working out who you truly are for an entire year then you deserve a bit of a romantic celebration. Sadly it is becoming increasingly customary these days to spend your anniversary with your partner and not with prostitutes, but traditional values will come back into vogue, don't worry. Another war will see to that.

WTF

Baby Ecard with text: I promise to always look after your child provided you NEVER turn into one of those people who get weird and serious about babysitters who raid your medicine cabinet.

never

Two thirds of our team are back from our Fact Finding Mission to Spain, where we studied Alcohol Intolerance and Sleep Deprivation. (It wasn't a competition but I still won!) I left the most responsible of us behind in Boston to run Wrongcards, as well as to teach him just how far Being Responsible will get him. Today's card is about babies I think. Next time I post I'll research it better.

Baby

Reminders Ecard with text: It may not be ethical, but simulating serious psychological problems can result in free accommodation and drugs.

simulating

I had a responsibility once. Most harrowing four minutes of my life. When the old lady came back and thanked me for minding her groceries I was covered in a dread-laden sweat. I don't need to learn a lesson twice - I've been skirting responsibilities ever since. So even though I want to be an inspiration to you all, I can't teach you this stuff. Have you guys SEEN a calendar? Stressful...

Reminders

from the newsletter

Nobody kicks Byron in the head. It makes me sad for him.

— Cyclones and Potato Chips

my newsletter is called

My Blameless Life

read it here ➞

you might also like
Mother's Day Ecard with text: Don't worry Mother. When I'm high I love you at least twenty-five percent more than usual. It just accentuates everything!

when im high

It's that time of year when we all remember our mothers. That's right. Mothers Day is nigh - at least, it is in North America. Different countries tend to celebrate Mothers Day at different times of year. I know, right? Why can't the world just agree on one thing? It's like we were all brought up badly or something. Anyway. This card has 25% more good taste than the others.

Mother's Day

WTF Ecard with text: The fact that elephants are expected never to forget anything can make impending anniversaries for male elephants profoundly stressful, and been shown to lead to anxiety, depression and drug use. This elephant (pictured) is addicted to tranquilizers.

elephants

Anniversaries are great. If you can keep someone from working out who you truly are for an entire year then you deserve a bit of a romantic celebration. Sadly it is becoming increasingly customary these days to spend your anniversary with your partner and not with prostitutes, but traditional values will come back into vogue, don't worry. Another war will see to that.

WTF

Baby Ecard with text: I promise to always look after your child provided you NEVER turn into one of those people who get weird and serious about babysitters who raid your medicine cabinet.

never

Two thirds of our team are back from our Fact Finding Mission to Spain, where we studied Alcohol Intolerance and Sleep Deprivation. (It wasn't a competition but I still won!) I left the most responsible of us behind in Boston to run Wrongcards, as well as to teach him just how far Being Responsible will get him. Today's card is about babies I think. Next time I post I'll research it better.

Baby

Reminders Ecard with text: It may not be ethical, but simulating serious psychological problems can result in free accommodation and drugs.

simulating

I had a responsibility once. Most harrowing four minutes of my life. When the old lady came back and thanked me for minding her groceries I was covered in a dread-laden sweat. I don't need to learn a lesson twice - I've been skirting responsibilities ever since. So even though I want to be an inspiration to you all, I can't teach you this stuff. Have you guys SEEN a calendar? Stressful...

Reminders

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An illustration of a coffee-cup, and the text: 'buy me coffee'.

the more stoned i get

...

tags:goose, ducks, stoned, marijuana, ducks, geese, weed, drugs

the more stoned i get, the more awesome ducks become
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