Ecard text: oh jesus - you are so not frickin' prepared for this
About Wrongcards
Wrongcards offers free, funny ecards that are wrong for every occasion. The site is 'not-for-profit' and contains no ads, other than some reminders that the site's founder writes funny books that you can find at Amazon.

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Random Cards
Ecard text: I am giving you this Birthday Card even though you haven't done anything sufficiently sexual in nature to deserve it. Oh look, this bed is empty. (A picture of a bed)
Ecard text: I hope a kind of pretentious hand-drawn card will excuse me from feigning an enthusiasm I do not feel. Its not personal, its just not my birthday and it sucks.
Ecard text: Help i'm trapped on a crazy planet and the monkeys are in charge.
Ecard text: happy anniversary. And if today turns out not to be our anniversary, then maybe this can make up for some other time I forgot.
BOOKS BY ME

"The plan was simple — steal the world's most famous skull, and tell no more than 37 close personal friends and co-workers."

— The Harvard Skull Fiasco

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"One of the funniest books that I've read."
—Joe Z.

"A fun, zany book full of quirky characters, witty banter, and clever plot twists."
— E. C. Rider.

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"I enjoyed this the second entry in the "Blue Bandicoot" series even more than the first; in particular the second half here is fantastic."
—James M.

"Wickedly funny."
— R. Massey

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The omnibus edition contains The Harvard Skull Fiasco and Rise of the Blue Bandicoot. The third book will be added for free in late 2020.