free ecards that are
wrong for every occasion
Inspirational Ecard with text: ALways be optimistic. But don't be as optimistic as a dog. A dog will eat its own vomit with the expectation that it will just work out better the second time around. You know what? Don't be optimistic. It doesn't work.
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about this card: optimism | Don’t listen to what some people say, everyone is an optimist. Everyone is being completely optimistic - they might as well embrace the reality. Whenever I turn on the television I stare at it for eight minutes, turn it off and then have to go lie down because civilisation is clearly coming to a sticky end. But then I’m up 15 minutes later because Fox News must not win. See? Optimism. In other news, I should be a motivational speaker.
The Harvard Skull Fiasco

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Valentines Ecard with text: I don't understand the basic point of Valentines Day so let's instead admire this picture of a penguin holding an ice cream.
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Valentines Ecard with text: If you think about it, there's nothing sexier than an octopus.
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Christmas Ecard with text: I may or may not have gotten you a Christmas spider. The joy lies in the discovery.
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New Year's Ecard with text: Happy New Year. Have fun out there but remember: spider monkeys. They're a silent killer.
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Christmas Ecard with text: Merry Christmas. Good children receive gifts from Santa and bad children get eaten by the Christmas Leopard. Look - don't get angry at me, I don't make up the rules.
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