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Ecard text: Before embarking on a journey of revenge, dig two graves in case you happen to meet a clown out there.
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I just spent 20 minutes looking for my keys - they get moved around by my enemies - and suddenly realized what an awful day Karl Rove must be having. He dropped millions trying to buy his friend a job but it didn't pan out due to an unanticipated technical error (they counted the votes). Then I found my keys. Woot! They were in a boot. I guess Obama and I are both having a good day.

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"Shea is beginning to think that stealing the world's most famous skull wasn't the best way to launch his career in cat burglary..."

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From My Newsletter, June 20, 2019

I also considered throwing a chair through a window, but I didn't because it was my chair, and also my window. One should be particular when it comes to picking out targets for petty acts of vandalism.

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Ecard text: tragically, this shot would be illegal in most parts of the world. Lobby governments to overturn laws that protect clowns.
On Wednesdays I like to post an older card and then spend the rest of the day serving my community. Now, you can't really save the world on your own, but what you CAN do is pick one issue or cause and focus on that. Me? I work to raise awareness of clowns. I'm just trying to make a difference.
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Ecard text: If life has taught me anything it is that the best time to throw darts at a clown is when he is juggling.
On Wednesdays I like to post an older card and then spend the rest of the day using inexplicable similes. This is, of course, the only routine I have but it still gnaws at my mind like a rabid woodchuck. That aside, can we all agree that there is something horribly wrong with clowns?
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Ecard text: Clowns.. if a few go missing now and then, who is going to notice?
It's re-hash Wednesday, which means I get to publish an older card and take the rest of the day off, ideally to do something frivolous. It's an important tradition to me because Wrongcards is a work of great seriousness and without a little bit of irresponsibility I'd probably go mad.
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Ecard text: the ideal New Years Resolution should include the mention of a dead clown, a chain-saw, a stolen golf buggy, half a pound of peyote and a determination to improve oneself.
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