'Historians dont actually know who Saint Valentine was or how he became martyred. Geoffrey Chaucer and his mates in the 14th Century began to associate the day with romantic love about a thousand years after he died. And I'm not celebrating it because it's ridiculous'

Obviously I'm trying to raise some awareness here. Maybe launch a movement. Perhaps Valentines Day can topple over one day, like the statue of a dictator. The only thing stopping me from pointing out that this is a completely made-up holiday is the fact that they're ALL completely made up holidays! Also, nobody has ever sent me a Valentines Day thing. But whatevs. Not bitter; it's the institution.