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Ecard text: The most effective way to deal with any manifestation of sibling rivalry among small children is to issue them with light sabers.
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Like most people I had parents. They ran a complex experiment on me called 'raising a child without reading a book or consulting anybody who has done it before'. But they must have done something right because God says he prefers me to just about everybody else in the world. In fact I could become a prophet but I suffer from a phobia of beards. Today's card is about families.

Read my latest book

"Shea is beginning to think that stealing the world's most famous skull wasn't the best way to launch his career in cat burglary..."

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The Story So Far, Part II

I had just learned I was about to become a father. The timing was somewhat less than ideal. You see ...

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Ecard text: 'Remember: do not bite a colleague or co-worker, no matter how agitated you are feeling, because they will get really disappointed in you.'
After I realized that I had mastered Workplace Behavior, Norms and Etiquette, I realized it would be selfish of me not to share my knowledge with others. So I started to encode subtle Workplace Survival Tips into certain cards - today's card, for example. There's no need to thank me ... I do it for the glory.
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Family cards

Ecard text: Genghis Khan killed his own brother when he was thirteen. And he went on to greatness. This is not a threat, just an observation based on a factual instance from history.
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Thanksgiving cards

Ecard text: This Thanksgiving, let's be thankful to the US government for only supplying guns to calm, rational people with moderate religious views and opinions.
I'm not American but I live in Boston. Thanksgiving is a lovely holiday that celebrates family life with good food and confusing games of football. I don't like the tradition of forcing foreign male guests to sleep with all the old ladies present but it's your holiday and I respect local customs even when I don't understand them.
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