Thanksgiving Ecard with text: Thanksgiving this year will be all about that very special feeling of gratitude that we can now finally sit and smirk

21 Nov 2008

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woke mind virus

My recent diagnosis (turns out I have a mind virus) was a bit of a surprise. I'd just been saying something like, 'wouldn't it be nice if everybody felt equal', and wham! Apparently mind viruses are everwhere now. Good news is Elon is working on a brain implant, so I'm not too worried.

Political Satire

all birthdays

Life's been boring lately apart from a global pandemic, murder hornets, millions saying the virus is a hoax, plus riots, nitwits who think masks don't need to cover their noses, people posting on social media about Bill Gates using 5G for mind-control, and billionaires using social media for, um, actual mind-control, plus Nazis and possibly another plague but everything's fine I guess how are you.

Birthday

historical awareness

Alright, squad, I'm back. I've been off writing a book. It's finished now - what did I miss? I haven't been watching the news or anything - how is Bernie Sanders doing against Jeb Bush? Me? I'm feeling great. I grew a beard for a while and lived in my back yard, burned furniture to keep warm. Writing that book sure was a process. But we'll talk later. For now: Happy Columbus Day.

Columbus Day

Christmas Ecard with text: In the United States, twelve million adults believe the world is secretly controlled by lizard people. But go ahead, teach impressionable children that Sant Claus is real. What could possibly go wrong? (Picture of a lizard man in a Santa Hat.)

what could go wrong

Christmas is nigh. Little orphans are peddling old shoes. Mums are smoking broken pencils and Dads are drinking turpentine and waving tire irons at invisible winged-snakes again. I know, I know - even I get maudlin and sentimental around this time of year. To be honest, I don't really understand today's card. But then, I don't really understand most of the things I say...

Christmas

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