Ecard text: dear dad, thank you for taking the time to knock-up my mother. you sure earned this father's day card. your child.
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Wrongcards offers free, funny ecards that are wrong for every occasion. The site is 'not-for-profit' and contains no ads, other than some reminders that the site's founder writes funny books that you can find at Amazon.

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Random Cards
Ecard text: A zombie apocalypse can get pretty lonely. But no matter how alone, how bored, how curious, don't even think about it.
Ecard text: I have learned that if it starts yowling, it is probably only pretending to be a piñata. In which case one should stop drinking immediately.
Ecard text: I am not buying you a Christmas Present because I am already such a gift in your life. And further gifts would be wasted on anybody who doesn't already know this. Illustration right: I JUST FELT LIKE DRAWING A LIZARD MAN.
Ecard text: You are not allowed to be bored at work until AFTER you have forced Human Resources to amend the Employee Handbook with fourteen pages detailing the prohibition of Weaponized Squid Delivery Devices.
BOOKS BY ME

"The plan was simple — steal the world's most famous skull, and tell no more than 37 close personal friends and co-workers."

— The Harvard Skull Fiasco

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"I enjoyed this the second entry in the "Blue Bandicoot" series even more than the first; in particular the second half here is fantastic."
—James M.

"Wickedly funny."
— R. Massey

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The omnibus edition contains The Harvard Skull Fiasco and Rise of the Blue Bandicoot. The third book will be added for free in late 2020.