About This Card

Writing work emails is easy. First, I write what I have to say on a piece of paper, then I carefully set fire to that paper and stamp the ashes into oblivion. Then I take a muscle relaxant, sit down at my desk and type up the opposite of what I wrote on the paper and click send. Finally I stab my childhood teddy bear in the head with a pair of scissors.

From My Newsletter, October 30, 2019

Why must Halloween be so awkward? read more

Shea is beginning to think that stealing the world's most famous skull wasn't the best way to launch his career in cat burglary...

Read for free on Kindle Unlimited

"One of the funniest books that I've read."
—Joe Z.

"A fun, zany book full of quirky characters, witty banter, and clever plot twists."
— E. C. Rider.

"Wickedly funny." — R. Massey

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