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page 22

Concerned Ecards

Thinking of You Ecard with text: ladybugs are beautiful, and packed with protein

ladybugs are beautiful

Lady bugs really are beautiful. One time, I was made to go to a meeting, so I delivered a presentation about something called Lady Bug Protein and Developing Markets, and how the 21st century was all going to be hamburgers made from lady bugs. And you know what? I totally aced the presentation, even though I made up all the facts and statistics five minutes earlier. Pity the meeting was with Human Resources.

Thinking of You

Thinking of You Ecard with text: you're so uptight, you'd get out of a bath to take a dump

so uptight

I would never defecate in my own bath, obviously ; it's unhygienic. But I'd definitely do it in the bath of my enemies. Amusing story: the head of Human Resources never locks her upstairs bathroom window. Actually, I just remembered - the legal advice I received prevents me from continuing that story, which is a pity really. On a different topic, the head of HR has used up all her mental health days for this year. Talk about neurotic!

Thinking of You

Apology Ecard with text: i'm sorry i spat in your ice cream the other day

spat in your ice cream

First of all, if I did spit in somebody's ice cream - and I'm not saying I did - then maybe that person should have bought me an ice cream as well. If they'd just been a little less selfish then maybe we wouldn't be here. Also, why do people always want to bring Human Resources into everything? Wouldn't it have been simpler just to buy someone an ice cream? Nobody in Human Resources has ever bought me an ice cream either. What do those people even do, anyway?

Apology

Reminders Ecard with text: remember i'm way crazier than you so maybe you should just humor me

humor me

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Reminders

Get Well Ecard with text: youre so boring when youre sick so get well soon

so boring

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Get Well

CheerUp Ecard with text: just remember he has to sleep sometime

he has to sleep sometime

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CheerUp

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