Lady bugs really are beautiful. One time, I was made to go to a meeting, so I delivered a presentation about something called Lady Bug Protein and Developing Markets, and how the 21st century was all going to be hamburgers made from lady bugs. And you know what? I totally aced the presentation, even though I made up all the facts and statistics five minutes earlier. Pity the meeting was with Human Resources.
I would never defecate in my own bath, obviously ; it's unhygienic. But I'd definitely do it in the bath of my enemies. Amusing story: the head of Human Resources never locks her upstairs bathroom window. Actually, I just remembered - the legal advice I received prevents me from continuing that story, which is a pity really. On a different topic, the head of HR has used up all her mental health days for this year. Talk about neurotic!
First of all, if I did spit in somebody's ice cream - and I'm not saying I did - then maybe that person should have bought me an ice cream as well. If they'd just been a little less selfish then maybe we wouldn't be here. Also, why do people always want to bring Human Resources into everything? Wouldn't it have been simpler just to buy someone an ice cream? Nobody in Human Resources has ever bought me an ice cream either. What do those people even do, anyway?
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