Or more accurately, ecards for NOT showing concern. It's all very subjective, really.
These days, on an almost daily basis, I find myself needing to apologize to someone. Sometimes I even need to apologize sincerely. When that happens, I make a wrongcard. Then I ask myself 'what have I got to apologize for?' and, instead of sending it, I eat a muffin. It's a pretty good system really.
Today is re-hash Wednesday, so I get to post an older card that I happen to like. This one has a picture of a duck. It also promotes empathy, which I read is one of the great themes of art and literature. Empathy, a heightened sensibility to the rich tapestry that is the human experience, and ducks. It's all there, see.
I'm a good boy: I visit Mother once every three years whether I want to or not, though I tend not to call her on Mothers Day in case she starts to get uppish. I'm a firm believer in doing nice things for Mother so I will probably remember to send her this card this year.
Someone told me I was obliged to create Easter cards this week so I had to reply that, because I have problems with authority, I tend to ignore advice. Then I needed an apology card and here it is. In other news, I can't believe it's already Tuesday. It's like Monday was only yesterday.
Sometimes I look upon the sprawling glory that is Wrongcards and see that it is good. And other times - today, for instance - I'm fairly sure that I'm going to hell.
I never argue with people unless I think they're wrong about something. But I generally feel that any action which may result in having to dig six-foot holes in the backyard at 2am isn't ultimately worth it. Anyway, I made you all this apology card. This is the part where you feel grateful. Oh stop it, it's nothing.
There are cards for you, and there are cards for me ... and today's card is for me. I don't really want to talk about it
It hurts me to imagine that someone is out there at this very moment apologetically saying, "I'm sorry, I have no excuse...." I spend my life thinking up excuses, so take it from me - [sorry, the rest of this thought was written down by me and then eaten by ducks. WHY WOULD I LIE ABOUT THAT?]
Back when I was poor and unnourished, I lived with a guy who used to drink my milk while I slept. As a comparative ratio, based on my assets at the time, this equated roughly to stealing my car. But I never put a note on anything in the fridge. Even to me, who once suffered, a note on milk is an instruction to steal.
Today's wrongcard offers a workplace survival tip. BTW if you are ever subjected to a Human Resources meeting about fire safety awareness you should interrupt occasionally with remarks like: "But you have to admit that fire is incredibly beautiful" and "But you'll agree nothing purifies quite like fire." It helps pass the time.
Today's card is a sympathy card which means you can send it to people who say they know someone who has recently died. Sometimes I suspect people make up stories like that for attention or to evade responsibilities. If you harbor doubts about someone, send along today's card and study them carefully to see if they look guilty.
You can use today's card to extricate yourself from an invitation to a party so that you can do more important things, like space out on the internet or micromanage your Japanese fugu smuggling operation. This card is just so amazingly reasonable - what could possibly go wrong?