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Columbus Day

Columbus Day Ecards, Because Its a Thing, Apparently.

You don’t have to do much reading at wikipedia to find out that Christopher Columbus was a bit of a jerk. He led a band of veritable neocons to the (ahem) New World where they generally behaved like a bunch of property tycoons and reality television stars. They grabbed women inappropriately and acted like racist jerks, to put it mildly.

In short, his crew was about as virtous as moral as a Dick Cheney hunting party. They also killed a bunch of people for being brown and having valuable minerals. Pretty much run-of-the-mill 21st Century foreign policy, except without the drones. Why do Americans celebrate Columbus Day? Generations of really bad high school history teachers in an education system run on a shoe-string budget. Why is school funding hooked up to property-taxes, anyway? Why not make it all federal? Make it fair and equitable, huh? But look at me - trying to save America again….


Columbus Day Ecard with text: If you're going to celebrate Columbus Day then show some historical awareness, perhaps by spending the day giving syphilis to Europeans.
Columbus Day Ecards view send
about this card: historical awareness | Alright, squad, I'm back. I've been off writing a book. It's finished now - what did I miss? I haven't been watching the news or anything - how is Bernie Sanders doing against Jeb Bush? Me? I'm feeling great. I grew a beard for a while and lived in my back yard, burned furniture to keep warm. Writing that book sure was a process. But we'll talk later. For now: Happy Columbus Day.