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Home Ecards

See also Celebration Concerned Dark Humor Family Holiday Jewish Just Because Love

Baby ecard with text: congratulation on your infant. here is hoping it is not an evil devil baby with demonic powers like pyrokinesis.

evil devil baby

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Birthday ecard with text: I hope you enjoy your birthday because only God knows how many you have left or which birthday will be your last, and He just wants the whole thing to be an hilarious surprise.

god will have his jokes

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Inspirational ecard with text: Many live their lives forgetting that each day is precious. This is why I'm doing society a favor when I make random bomb threats.

teaching appreciation

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Sympathy ecard with text: Im sorry that death is such a buzz kill and that Ive been thinking more about breasts than your tragic loss. I just find them very life-affirming. See? Life-affirming.

life affirming

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WTF ecard with text: My scientific experiments on dead mice have brought me tantalizingly close to conquering death ! ... Wait a sec ... Nope, false alarm. Still no progress, sorry.

one mouse at a time

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WTF ecard with text: ironically penile augmentation is cheaper than this car

devils hands

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Workplace ecard with text: Well I am glad that they hired you. Even if it was only to prove that they are an equal opportunities employer.

equal opportunities

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Dark Humor ecard with text: You can talk about Star Trek the Original Series, William Shatner, lens flare in space,which Captain was better, or where the new film departs from the official canon any time you want. You just need to tell me first so I can leave the room.

trekkies whatever

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Congratulations ecard with text: Congratulations but we both know that youre not really successful in life until Ronald McDonald puts out a restraining order against you. Until then, you are just dicking around.

ronald mcdonald

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Mother's Day ecard with text: Happy Mothers Day Few Mothers have done more for their progeny than you. Excepting those who died in childbirth of course. I mean, we have to give credit where credit is due. Those Mothers make your maternal sacrifices seem trivial.

maternal sacrifice

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