Tagged as #anger.


molotov cocktails

Never play with fire, they say, but that's no way to win at monopoly. I've started three fires during games of monopoly and went on to win each game. I think of fire as the God of Winning.
Ecard text: FYI - I have stopped carrying molotov cocktails around with me.I just dont trust myself with them anymore.

effortless

Apologies? Well, there are times when the Nice People From Human Resources have ushered you into a special meeting, and they've given you a scone and tea and are talking in careful measured tones about 'conduct', whatever the hell that is. When that happens, don't throw the scone at anyone. Trust me. Anyhoo, I've got nothing to say about apologies.
Ecard text: I am sorry you sometimes say irrational things when you get angry and that my effortless rebuttal only seems to further infuriate you.

self-made man

I’m aware I have had certain advantages in life. Not every boy gets to grow up knowing his dad was both an astronaut AND an arctic explorer. My grandmother says it’s a pity my dad had to go into hiding when the lizard people from Rigel VI surreptitiously took control of all the world’s major governments, because I’d have really liked him.
Ecard text: Dad, thanks for turning me into a self-made man

communication

I've never been a person who makes up excuses but that has never been my fault. Usually I was too busy, or a thing came up, or I had to stay late or I was volunteering at a hospital helping nurses put on stockings. But nowadays I think 'inventing excuses' is my calling. I'd like to elaborate further but there's a helicopter waiting to take me to the White House. Look, my life is complicated.
Ecard text: I’m not telling you why I am angry  with you because I don’t want  “communication” to rob our  relationship of its mystery.

anger management

On Wednesdays I like to post an older card and then spend the rest of the day listening to Rush Limbaugh. Not really. No I don't do that. It's not often that Wrongcards goes too far and posts something that tasteless on the internet but it happened right there a second ago and I'm sorry. It's a good thing Mother doesn't know about Wrongcards.
Ecard text: i have found that VIOLENCE Is a highly effective technique for anger management

not getting angry

What people sometimes call 'anger management issues' I prefer to describe as 'an impaired ability to cope with fools and idiots'. Of course, I'm not one to promote bad-tempered irrationality (I'm no Bill O'Reilly) but we're all entitled to our moments, and a deficit of sleep might make this card seem useful.
Ecard text: I'm not going to get angry today provided nobody provokes me by breathing too loudly.

taking the time

Ecard text: dear dad, thank you for taking the time to knock-up my mother. you sure earned this father's day card. your child.