identity issues

CheerUp Ecard with text: If you absolutely must have Identity Issues, then please, for the sake of everyone around you, try to make them interesting. (Picture of a man in a gorilla suit holding a large fish.) — **about this card:**
*identity issues* | So the story behind this card is that I was walking near the zoo early this morning when a gorilla escaped its enclosure. I had the good fortune to be eating a toffee apple, which the gorilla had a particular fondness for, so we shared the toffee, had a bit of a heart to heart and then, in a newly restored state of mental calm, the gorilla legged it back over the wall into the zoo. BTW if it doesn't rain on Thursday we're both going swimming!

school girl

Love Ecard with text: I think that if you really cared about me I would have come home to find you dressed as a Japanese school girl at least half a dozen times by now. — **about this card:**
*school girl* | Look - I'm not saying I don't have issues but when I showed today's card to the guy who delivers my mail he embraced me, burst into tears and declared himself 'expressed'. I showed it to the guy in Starbucks and he grasped my hand firmly, called me brother and announced my lattes would be free forever or his life would be forfeit. It's not all that bad being a spiritual leader some days.

grim reaper

Apology Ecard with text: i'm sorry i wore the grim reaper costume to your grandmothers 82nd birthday. and once again, i am sorry for your sudden, tragic loss. — **about this card:**
*grim reaper* | A card not to send in the unlikely event of an elderly Grand Mother dying. Remember, it is always considered tasteful to apologize.

latest newsletters

I've been revisiting some of my older cards. Some of them are inexplicable.

Some games of cricket can last for weeks. In fact, I think that's one of the reasons I moved to America.

I slightly injured myself. Then, whilst forced to do nothing at all, I began to wonder about my own mental well-being.

And then I was locked up in a holding cell, wondering what to do next.

I tell you, it really makes a man think.