Free ecards that are wrong for every occasion.

birds and bees

June 13, 2013
Father's Day Ecard with text: Happy Fathers Day and thank you for teaching me about the birds and the bees by leaving your porn stash in a location that was conveniently accessible to children.
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about this card:
birds and bees | My Dad wasn't around much when I was a kid 'cause he was busy walking on the moon or making movies, so I had 20 or so 'other Dads', owing to Nanna's natural charisma. They taught me all sorts of things, like how to borrow cars, how to grow plants inside a cupboard and how to drive quickly away from banks. Today's card? Send it to your Dad(s).

self-made man

June 15, 2012
Father's Day Ecard with text: Dad, thanks for turning me into a self-made man
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about this card:
self-made man | I’m aware I have had certain advantages in life. Not every boy gets to grow up knowing his dad was both an astronaut AND an arctic explorer. My grandmother says it’s a pity my dad had to go into hiding when the lizard people from Rigel VI surreptitiously took control of all the world’s major governments, because I’d have really liked him.

commonality

June 17, 2011
Father's Day Ecard with text: Happy Father's Day, even if we don't have much in common other than an early interest in my Mother's breasts.
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about this card:
commonality | Look over your shoulder - is somebody there? If not, quietly click on the link and look upon the Wrongcard that you won't be sending your Dad for Father's Day. Then - close the window and try not to think about it too much.