free ecards that are
wrong for every occasion

so i am not delusional

May 24, 2013 · Kris St.Gabriel
WTF Ecard with text: If I was delusional then God would not have personally befriended me in the first place.
view send

about this card:
so i am not delusional | I'm not a contentious person because everyone always ends up agreeing with me - at least eventually. Here at Wrongcards I like to stick to safe topics like religion, which reminds me of why I called the site 'wrongcards' in the first place: because I'm right about stuff and people are wrong, though they'll get there eventually which is why I like everyone. Also God told me to call it that.

jackal head

May 23, 2013 · Kris St.Gabriel
Thinking of You Ecard with text: I am treating you with caution until I am certain that you are not going to turn into one of that Jackal-Headed gods of Ancient Egypt, because I'm sick of investing myself in people and winding up feeling foolish.
view send

about this card:
jackal head | I forgot to login to Facebook for two months. No ill-effects, although I don't think Bill Gate's mind control 5G towers are working on me as well as they used to. And I think the vaccine nanobots are on the blink. Still, I did do some renovations at Wrongcards.com, so that's some good news. Oh, and there's this card ...

redacted

March 21, 2013 · Kris St.Gabriel
CheerUp Ecard with text: Cheer up. God might not be listening to you but the CIA always is.
view send

about this card:
redacted | I guess I was born to cheer people up. When someone is sad I remind them that they could die at any moment, perhaps at the hand of a someone they know, who pays for axes with cash, and is, moreover, familiar with the floor plan of their house. God clearly wants us all to be happy, so am I an act of God? I don't know, the Vatican is still ignoring my letters. Nice bureaucracy, guys.

make yourself agreeable

October 3, 2012 · Kris St.Gabriel
WTF Ecard with text: God has appeared to me and revealed that you must make yourself more agreeable to me.
view send

about this card:
make yourself agreeable | On Wednesdays I like to post an older card, and then spend the rest of the day working undercover at a company that manufactures cafe furniture. For years I've been secretly implementing policies that ensure all cafe tables are sold with one leg slightly too short. I guess some men just want to watch the world burn.

evolution

September 14, 2012 · Kris St.Gabriel
Topical Ecard with text: I don't know what scares me more - International Terrorism, or that 46% of American voters believe the world was created in six days.
view send

about this card:
evolution | One of my daily challenges is the fact that I understand politics better than everybody else. I already know who will win the US election - some really rich Americans who live in Monaco and Switzerland. Normal Americans who live inside the United States won't fare so well, of course, but at least they'll get to have some interesting arguments among themselves at Thanksgiving.

synchronized swimming

August 2, 2012 · Kris St.Gabriel
Olympics Ecard with text: Synchronized Swimmers never drown during Olympic Events. And this means that God cannot possibly exist.
view send

about this card:
synchronized swimming | There was a time when our troubled relationship with the International Olympic Committee still had a chance. In retrospect I think the turning point came when we showed them this card. 'Cause about ten seconds later one them threw a mango at me. Seriously, who does that? Some of those IOC guys can be really immature when confronted with Art.

evidence

September 12, 2011 · Kris St.Gabriel
Topical Ecard with text: We can argue all day whether or not God gets high, but I think the evidence is clear.
view send

about this card:
evidence | I never like to hear people arguing about religion because that means they're not sitting there listening attentively to me. Everyone has a different approach to religious debate. Mine is to scream: That Is Anathema! until everyone leaves. I guess it's important to win.