free ecards that are
wrong for every occasion

arm the teachers

February 25, 2018 · Kris St.Gabriel
Topical Ecard with text: nobody likes the political well informed. try and fit in by talking about paris hilton and nicole richie. you are not allowed to be remarkable.
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arm the teachers | People are always talking about their right to own a gun; they never talk about MY right to own a gun. If I owned a gun I'd be shooting it all the time. Double-parked cars. The occasional jet ski. This bus driver who closed the door as I was about to get on, who I chased for two miles on foot. The real reason I shouldn't have a gun is how much I want one. And also how much I want a bazooka.

calm rational people

November 20, 2010 · Kris St.Gabriel
Thanksgiving Ecard with text: This Thanksgiving, let's be thankful to the US government for only supplying guns to calm, rational people with moderate religious views and opinions.
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calm rational people | I'm not American but I live in Boston. Thanksgiving is a lovely holiday that celebrates family life with good food and confusing games of football. I don't like the tradition of forcing foreign male guests to sleep with all the old ladies present but it's your holiday and I respect local customs even when I don't understand them.

if pooh bear

September 26, 2008 · Kris St.Gabriel
WTF Ecard with text: on his first foray into the hundred acre wood, christopher robin shot a bear, two kangaroos, a piglet, a rabbit and a small tiger. but no heffalumps or woozles.the stories would have been much, much shorter if a.a.milne had been texan.
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if pooh bear | Today is re-hash Wednesday, which means I get to post an older card that I happen to like. Unless you have the need to intimidate an assortment of talking, literate farm animals, this card isn't going to be of much use to you. But, by George Orwell, who would want to do that?