Free ecards that are wrong for every occasion.

spring tidings

April 22, 2016
Passover Ecard with text: Passover is the only part of the year in which you are allowed to throw buckets of lamb's blood at people's front doors without them accusing you of being a sociopath.
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about this card:
spring tidings | Now, I may not know anything about the world's religions but I don't like to think that it should prevent me from forming deeply held convictions on the topic. My Nanna taught me from the earliest age that only a few of us will be saved from the earth by lizard-people in flying saucers, so your guess is as good as mine. So Happy Passover (and Happy Dragon-Egg Festival, Nanna)!

just try

September 16, 2013
Jewish Ecard with text: Dear Jewish person, I agree to be your friend on the condition that you at least TRY not to kill Jesus when he comes back.
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about this card:
just try | The only reason Wrongcards has not officially endorsed a religion is because we haven't yet received a sponsorship offer. My hope is that we'll be sponsored by Christianity though I don't know much about it other than its founder was a tall, bearded, blue-eyed guy with North-American good looks. Still, his followers seem to be pretty heavily-armed, which I think is pretty persuasive really.

jesus forgives

December 7, 2012
Jewish Ecard with text: I think Jesus will forgive you for being Jewish. Some of his best friends were Jewish.
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about this card:
jesus forgives | We've been talking a lot about Christmas here lately but let's not forget that Jews also have a Christmas celebration (called Kawanza) that happens sometime between November and February I think. I read that jewish priests ordained it as a sin for Jews to exchange presents, but I'm sure no one will get in trouble if they just send Jewish wrongcards instead.

pyramid incident

April 11, 2012
Passover Ecard with text: Happy Passover. Though I'm sorry your people didn't stick around to help finish the pyramids because they turned out pretty nice in the end.
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about this card:
pyramid incident | On Wednesdays I prefer to post an older, more obscure card and then get to work on my bible. I'm writing a new bible, see, but with Cylons, because I like Cylons and was disappointed when there weren't any in the original. I haven't read the Jewish bible but I've seen the movie and liked it, despite them setting the narrative in an historic setting.

hanukkah presents

December 18, 2011
Happy Hannukah Ecard with text: You would probably receive Christmas presents as well if you did what most of us do and pretend to be Christian.
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about this card:
hanukkah presents | When I was growing up the most I knew about Jewish people was that they didnt believe in Christmas and liked to wear very small hats. Still, every year I give at least one Jewish friend a Christmas present. Its not required, of course, but cultural sensitivity is all about making others speechless with gratitude.

rosh hashanah suggestion

September 30, 2011
Jewish Ecard with text: Happy Jewish New Year. Though I think if you move it to January 1st we would all find it easier to remember.
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about this card:
rosh hashanah suggestion | So I spent this week camping in the White Mountains in New Hampshire and mostly feeling terrified of bears. The Jewish New Year came and went and I was oblivious to the whole thing this time. Another thing I'm afraid of is firecrackers and people dancing about in dragon costumes. Thank God I'm agnostic.