Tagged as #lies.

fevered brows

It hurts me to imagine that someone is out there at this very moment apologetically saying, "I'm sorry, I have no excuse...." I spend my life thinking up excuses, so take it from me - [sorry, the rest of this thought was written down by me and then eaten by ducks. WHY WOULD I LIE ABOUT THAT?]
Ecard text: I regret that I cannot come over, but I must spend the evening attending to the needy and applying compresses to the fevered brows of sick orphans.

ridiculous lies

Ecard text: I am sorry for the ridiculous lies I have to make up to get you to put out.

the santa claus myth

Long-standing argument with my 6-year-old; she thinks Santa is real and I disagree. She thinks I'm needlessly skeptical. Interestingly, at this point I haven't bought a single Christmas present this year. I mean, there's still time for me to win this argument.
Ecard text: Santa makes all us comfortable with being lied to by authority figures. He teaches us that gullibility is more likely to be rewarded than skepticism.