silent killer

New Year's Ecard with text: Happy New Year. Have fun out there but remember: spider monkeys. They're a silent killer. — **about this card:**
*silent killer* | Remember a few years back when everyone thought the world would end because some Mayans had predicted it, even though the Mayans didn't predict the conquistadors? Well, I knew that was going to happen. I prophesied it. The only thing stopping me from closing down Wrongcards and becoming a professional prophet is the obligation to grow facial hair. I'm afraid of mustaches.

ghost monkeys

WTF Ecard with text: People who dont believe in phosphorescent ghost monkeys have a much harder time dealing with encounters with them. — **about this card:**
*ghost monkeys* | On Wednesdays I traditionally post an older card and then spend the rest of the day praising Rupert Murdoch's allegedly corrupt publishing empire. That they may or may not have bugged my phone and recorded me drunkenly singing Jewel songs at 2am has only made me more supportive of them.

crazy planet

Thinking of You Ecard with text: Help i'm trapped on a crazy planet and the monkeys are in charge.

latest newsletters

I've been revisiting some of my older cards. Some of them are inexplicable.

Some games of cricket can last for weeks. In fact, I think that's one of the reasons I moved to America.

I slightly injured myself. Then, whilst forced to do nothing at all, I began to wonder about my own mental well-being.

And then I was locked up in a holding cell, wondering what to do next.

I tell you, it really makes a man think.