appropriated holiday

Christmas Ecard with text: When we appropriated a pagan holiday,we didnt choose one with naked writhing priestesses performing orgiastic fertility rites and snake dances. No. We based our holiday on a Turkish guy called Nicholas who left coins in peoples shoes. — **about this card:**
*appropriated holiday* | I love Christmas. Christmas doesn't mean presents, trees, or Jesus having a birthday. It means pudding and fruit mince pies! And also explaining what those things are to skeptical Americans who, without pudding or fruit mince pies, have been getting Christmas wrong for centuries. Oh I should say something about this card. Let's see. Let me think. Hmm. How about 'I need to stop saying the truth or nobody is going to invite me to their Christmas parties...'

stand closer

Flirting and Pick Up Lines Ecard with text: i want to see more of you. could you stand closer to the window when you're naked?

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I've been revisiting some of my older cards. Some of them are inexplicable.

Some games of cricket can last for weeks. In fact, I think that's one of the reasons I moved to America.

I slightly injured myself. Then, whilst forced to do nothing at all, I began to wonder about my own mental well-being.

And then I was locked up in a holding cell, wondering what to do next.

I tell you, it really makes a man think.