Tagged as #nazis.


thanksgiving excuse

It's ALMOST AMERICAN THANKSGIVING. And this card? I created it in 2012 - SEVEN YEARS AGO! It wasn't supposed to be all that relevant. I mean this is Wrongcards not TOTALLY-PRESCIENT-CARDS. Also in 2012, I predicted that the Mayans were wrong and the world wouldn't end around Christmas. I did not, however, predict the rise of gumboots as a fashion accessory. But only because I'm sane.
Ecard text: I am sorry I cannot attend Thanksgiving with your family but I would rather kill Nazis on a Playstation than sit with them at a dinner table.

why we drink

It makes me sad that many people don't take St Patrick's Day seriously. Some will prance about in fatuous green socks, mention some highly unlikely Irish ancestor and then consider their obligations to the thing met. Not me. I'm a messenger. From God, probably. And if I don't explain this holiday then millions will be spending Saturday drunk for no reason at all. So here we go ...
Ecard text: We drink to remember St Patrick's liberation of Ireland from the Nazi-Alien occupation of 1932-1956, which you would know all about if you too watched the History Channel.

label nazi

Back when I was poor and unnourished, I lived with a guy who used to drink my milk while I slept. As a comparative ratio, based on my assets at the time, this equated roughly to stealing my car. But I never put a note on anything in the fridge. Even to me, who once suffered, a note on milk is an instruction to steal.
Ecard text: If you MUST insist on being a Refrigerator Label Nazi, could you at least buy milk I would WANT to steal?

busy killing nazis

Tradition dictates that I post an older card on Wednesdays, and today's card explores the same theme as yesterday's - that is: miscommunication. BTW, I've given a lot of thought to the topic of miscommunication and have decided I'm in favor of it overall. It also keeps me in business.
Ecard text: i am sorry that you only seem to want to communicate when i'm busy killing Nazis.