Tagged as #pony.


trite

I was in love once. It was an earth-shattering experience, a state of instant infatuation. As soon as I tasted that vanilla bean ice-cream cone I fell head over heals. Then, in that moment of ecstasy, some really annoying girl came up and asked for a taste. This is where the story gets bad. , , Turns out, she liked vanilla bean ice-cream too. You know what she does? She sits down right next to me and starts to take turns eating my ice-cream (!) And smiling at me in a simpering sort of way (!) Well, long story short, I only got to eat half of that ice-cream cone. But it was love that I felt for that ice-cream, I am sure of it. Makes me sad to remember, actually., , Sigh. That's love for you, I guess. , ,
Ecard text: Here it is. Your Valentines Day card. Because there just isn't enough trite sentimentality in the world. (A picture of an inflatable pony with the caption - mildly disturbing picture of an inflatable pony.)

pony free childhood

Ecard text: Happy Mothers Day. And just think about how much better our relationship would be if you had just bought me a pony like I asked?   I guess you'll have to be content with a crap ecard.

irrevocable pain

Ecard text: 'If you were paying attention you would have realized by now that you were promised a pony, but you never received this pony, and that this constitutes a massive betrayal in your life. And the only way to diminish this dull yet irrevocable pain in your heart is to stab random friends and co-workers with pens. Stop by later, I have some pens I'm prepared to sell you.'

everybody loves balloons

Ecard text: happy birthday! btw when i said i was getting you a pony, i kinda lied. instead, here is a picture of some very colorful balloons. yay! Yay! everyone loves balloons! now shhhhh! i want to watch my show.