Wrongcards tagged: Sex Toys
triteI was in love once. It was an earth-shattering experience, a state of instant infatuation. As soon as I tasted that vanilla bean ice-cream cone I fell head over heals. Then, in that moment of ecstasy, some really annoying girl came up and asked for a taste. This is where the story gets bad. , , Turns out, she liked vanilla bean ice-cream too. You know what she does? She sits down right next to me and starts to take turns eating my ice-cream (!) And smiling at me in a simpering sort of way (!) Well, long story short, I only got to eat half of that ice-cream cone. But it was love that I felt for that ice-cream, I am sure of it. Makes me sad to remember, actually., , Sigh. That's love for you, I guess. , ,
reciprocitySome companies profiteer from war. Others profiteer from love. Which is worse? Here at Wrongcards™ we like to ask the hard questions. Like - is our company guilt-tripping you with stupid made-up holidays? Or are we culture assassins engaged in a war on savagery and kitsch? The answer to that question is really up to you. Or, rather, our lawyers, who very boringly overruled this slogan idea for our website: 'Wrongcards: The Halliburton of Ecards'.
inflatable ponyRomance is dead, they said - but I found out where they buried it. Now it's safely hidden under my bed. Don't worry, it only smells when I get it damp.
not half so adventurousMay 9th is National Lost Sock Memorial Day. I believe that every washing machine manufactured after 1963 was designed to eat precisely one sock per month, just to keep everybody in the consumer world a little off-balance. So where do all the socks go? They're sacrificed, with noble intent, for our collective unease. It's a religion I'm starting. And, of course, I'll be taking donations...
practicallyToday's card is a rehash Wednesday flirting card which means it's probably Not Safe For Work (whatever that means) though it CAN be useful if you'd like to flirt with someone today. It will also make you more popular - every time I send it to a woman she writes back and tells me how much she just wants to be my friend, which obviously is very sweet and quite complimentary.
experimentingSometimes I look upon the sprawling glory that is Wrongcards and see that it is good. And other times - today, for instance - I'm fairly sure that I'm going to hell.
i don't judge youI suspect that today's wrongcard may be a little Not Safe For Work though I'm not sure or good at judging that sort of thing. It's a WTF card, though, which means it is probably more impractical than usual. It's a pity that 'cards that are wrong for every occasion' is such an impractical idea. Next time I start a company I'll do a business plan.
about you and meThis is one of the very first flirting cards we published. I feel that it is emotionally honest to let a person know just how awesome the night is going to be well in advance. It also gives them the chance to opt out in case they cannot handle high levels of pleasure.
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