Tagged as #suburbia.


identical boxes

Do you know anybody having a birthday this weekend? If so, this is not really the best card to send them. Unless you're giving them a completely rubbish present and you want to draw attention away from it. I once gave someone a chocolate bar wrapped up in gift paper, but that was before chocolate bars got so expensive.
Ecard text: Happy Birthday. You're going to get old and live in one of thousands of identical boxes and then get sad and die. But today is not the day to think about that, ok?

suburban halloween

The creepiest thing about Halloween is how it ritualistically teaches children to accept candy from strangers. The second creepy thing is that processed sugars are harmful and addictive substances that people just give to children anyway. The third creepy thing is that there's a goddamn skeleton covered in slightly damp meat, reading these words. What. I have to be the only one who's unsettled?
Ecard text: Let's get dressed up as suburban parents, knock on doors and ask if the candy is gluten-free.

well adjusted

Ecard text: if to be well adjusted and mentally healthy is to be happy in a cubicle, living out in suburbia and enjoying Reality TV, then I need a straight jacket right now.