Tagged as #weapons.


hatchets

I know that Christmas has traditionally been about department stores making money but I've always hoped it might one day become a holiday for children. For some reason people assume I'm cynical but I've always liked children: they're funny, and they remind me of how each of us used to be - truthful, spontaneous, amoral and interesting. No child has ever once bored me with talk of mortgages or promotions. So our first Christmas wrongcard is for the children.
Ecard text: Never annoy a dozen 4-year-olds who are armed with hatchets. Because they could probably take you down.

winged babies

I'm the sort of responsible guy you could take back to your parent's trailer without police needing to get involved but that's only cause my Nanna raised me proper. I remember us sharing a tin of cat food one night and her telling me how 'chicks dig a romantic'. So fellers - take note.
Ecard text: Happy Valentines Day. Because there is nothing weird about winged, naked babies holding weapons.

never forget

Ecard text: when the zombies attack i'll be right by your side