free ecards that are
wrong for every occasion

when im high

May 8, 2015 · Kris St.Gabriel
Mother's Day Ecard with text: Don't worry Mother. When I'm high I love you at least twenty-five percent more than usual. It just accentuates everything!
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about this card:
when im high | It's that time of year when we all remember our mothers. That's right. Mothers Day is nigh - at least, it is in North America. Different countries tend to celebrate Mothers Day at different times of year. I know, right? Why can't the world just agree on one thing? It's like we were all brought up badly or something. Anyway. This card has 25% more good taste than the others.

just stoned

April 18, 2012 · Kris St.Gabriel
Workplace Ecard with text: I am sorry about how I acted at work but in my defense I was pretty stoned most of the day. i did take the time to do some pretty wicked origami though.
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about this card:
just stoned | 'On Wednesdays I like to post a slightly older card and then I invariably I do something practical, like my taxes. I always put a dead bird into the envelope I send to the IRS - when they call me up about it I say it was an accident. FYI: federal employees are not paid enough to audit people who accidentally mail dead animals to them. I'm here to help.'

evidence

September 12, 2011 · Kris St.Gabriel
Topical Ecard with text: We can argue all day whether or not God gets high, but I think the evidence is clear.
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about this card:
evidence | I never like to hear people arguing about religion because that means they're not sitting there listening attentively to me. Everyone has a different approach to religious debate. Mine is to scream: That Is Anathema! until everyone leaves. I guess it's important to win.

everything is fine

July 14, 2011 · Kris St.Gabriel
Excuses Ecard with text: I can't hang out with you after all. Everything is fine. I just have to find out what's up with my weed.
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about this card:
everything is fine | I find people very demanding. "Do this, do that, be quiet, don't eat my pudding, put down that knife, tie it off with a tourniquet, drive me to a hospital, what do you mean we're stopping to buy ice cream?" Today's card? Send it to anyone and they'll probably just GIVE you their pudding. It's only reasonable, really.

the cow

May 18, 2008 · Kris St.Gabriel
WTF Ecard with text: 'the cow has given me my first mission. but i keep wondering: why would a sentient, pan-dimensional cow have such faith in a stoner like me, anyway?'
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about this card:
the cow | On Wednesdays I like to post a link to an older card and then spend the rest of the day standing outside retirement communities wearing a Grim Reaper costume. Look, it's the only place I can go without surprising anyone.