This Week's Featured Card

presenteeism

Planet Earth has been a blast lately. On the positive side, everybody has jumped on the 'Socially Isolating Yourself' bandwagon; guys, I've actually been doing that my entire life! I even built an entire website to help people become more socially isolated. You can just share cards like this with people and you're done. You don't even need to pretend to sell Essential Oils any more.

Ecard text: Thank you for coming into work sick and giving us all Avian/Swine Flu while bravely showing us all what a trooper you are.

Oh, and let's not forget this

getting attention

Or actually this

pinned

You can go ahead and send this card to anyone - no need to wait for them to be sick. Let's face it, the odds of them being sick tomorrow is way higher than normal. Oh, don't thank me. Thank the government!

Ecard text: I am sorry you are feeling sick tomorrow and wish there was something I could do to help,

Latest Card

hearts interchangeable

People often say to me, 'Kris, you're too romantic'. Not in real life, of course, but inside my mind. I'm pleased to say that much of what is said inside my mind is complimentary. I do feel some antipathy towards geese, however, but otherwise I feel I am on good-terms with the world; I both like and understand the world. But I will never understand why you people keep celebrating Valentines Day.

Ecard text: I know you wanted me to give you my heart but can I give you someone elses instead? It's just that I'm using mine at the moment. Happy Valentines Day Either Way

Also Recent

penguin with ice cream

Ever since 2003 ice cream has been a sad topic for me. You see, that year a girl asked to share my ice cream and unwittingly, I consented. I lost 46% of my bowl of ice cream that day. Tragedy - always lurking in the wings...

Ecard text: I don't understand the basic point of Valentines Day so let's instead admire this picture of a penguin holding an ice cream.

How I Cheer Myself Up During the Holidays

I like living here in Cambridge, Massachusetts, for at least six months out of every year. Then it gets cold and dark and dismal, and you have to be very deliberate about cheering yourself up. Here's an example of how I do that.