Yes I know it makes your parents uncomfortable but you said no more politics and besides, isn't it time we as a society had a conversation about turkey fondlers? Look, I know you say it's not a good time but you always say that and - Thanksgiving? I mean the topic just suggests itself! If your extended family is too immature to discuss turkey fondling, then fine but I don't know why I try so hard.
Oh, and let's not forget this
I'm not American but I live in Boston and have learned some of your customs. I know that Thanksgiving is about men sitting about watching sport all day while women cook for them. I have to admit this barbaric cultural practice does offend my modern sensibilities but I guess it's just a tradition that predates our contemporary awareness that men are better cooks than women.
Or actually this
It's ALMOST AMERICAN THANKSGIVING. And this card? I created it in 2012 - SEVEN YEARS AGO! It wasn't supposed to be all that relevant. I mean this is Wrongcards not TOTALLY-PRESCIENT-CARDS. Also in 2012, I predicted that the Mayans were wrong and the world wouldn't end around Christmas. I did not, however, predict the rise of gumboots as a fashion accessory. But only because I'm sane.
People often say to me, 'Kris, you're too romantic'. Not in real life, of course, but inside my mind. I'm pleased to say that much of what is said inside my mind is complimentary. I do feel some antipathy towards geese, however, but otherwise I feel I am on good-terms with the world; I both like and understand the world. But I will never understand why you people keep celebrating Valentines Day.
penguin with ice cream
Ever since 2003 ice cream has been a sad topic for me. You see, that year a girl asked to share my ice cream and unwittingly, I consented. I lost 46% of my bowl of ice cream that day. Tragedy - always lurking in the wings...