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Regretably, none of our cards are appropriate to send to anyone.*

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* Well, at least they're free!

WTF Ecard with text: Sometimes I see thing in the corner of my eye that I don't feel all that comfortable talking about yet.

Love Ecard with text: Don't worry about my co-dependency issues. They will only bring us closer together.

Wait, ecards that are wrong for every occasion?

I'm actually not good at business ideas.

Fortunately, my newsletter is a slice of fried gold.

I don’t know how many interactions I can have with German kettle manufacturers before something finally breaks within me.

— Never Go Full Rowling

So many troubles in the world seem to have come about from people being wrong about things, and frankly, I think they should cut it out.

— Don't Panic, but Douglas Adams Predicted All of This

Redcliffe doesn’t make you wonder if some evil genius is dumping methamphetamines into the water supply. You can exist here, somehow, for years without experiencing a sudden inclination to buy yourself a firearm. I think I was in Florida for four hours before I wanted to buy a gun.

— The Sunshine State Without the Crazy

Two years ago, he briefly died whilst feeding his hens; his pacemaker revived him, and he woke up surrounded by chickens. Understandably, they were giving him some fairly peculiar looks.

— Saying Goodbye To My Father

What sort of nonsense is this?

Well, here's two random cards I made. Yes. I know.

Love Ecard with text: Ironically, Justin the Inflatable Pony doesn't give me a hard time about MY relationship with YOU...

inflatable pony

Romance is dead, they said - but I found out where they buried it. Now it's safely hidden under my bed. Don't worry, it only smells when I get it damp.

WTF Ecard with text: after your third dead clown the fun begins to wear off a little

third dead clown

...

These great people bought me coffee

"I love the offbeat humour - just the thing for the silly season! Read your books a couple of weeks ago too. Laughed out loud - can't wait for more."

Sarah

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"I hear echoes of Monty Python and Mel Brooks (on a good day). Thank you, we need humor at this time. ...Insert political diatribe here..."

Rory G.

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"Really enjoyed the cards !"

Steve M.

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"Are you certain we're not related? You seem to share my exact same sentiments about our worldly circumstances!"

Oztru

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"Great cards, funny writing, and many thanks to you!"

Bill E.

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"I love your attitude!"

Linda B.

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