free ecards that are
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Columbus Day Ecard with text: If you're going to celebrate Columbus Day then show some historical awareness, perhaps by spending the day giving syphilis to Europeans.
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about this card: historical awareness | Alright, squad, I’m back. I’ve been off writing a book. It’s finished now - what did I miss? I haven’t been watching the news or anything - how is Bernie Sanders doing against Jeb Bush? Me? I’m feeling great. I grew a beard for a while and lived in my back yard, burned furniture to keep warm. Writing that book sure was a process. But we’ll talk later. For now: Happy Columbus Day.
The Harvard Skull Fiasco

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Christmas Ecard with text: In the United States, twelve million adults believe the world is secretly controlled by lizard people. But go ahead, teach impressionable children that Sant Claus is real. What could possibly go wrong? (Picture of a lizard man in a Santa Hat.)
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Independence Day Ecard with text: Happy July Fourth, commemorating George Washington's surrender of Fort Necessity to the French on this day in 1754.
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Independence Day Ecard with text: Americans will spend $600 million dollars on fireworks for the 4th of July. 99% of those fireworks will be imported from China. Happy Independence Day.
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Christmas Ecard with text: 'Merry Christmas. Remember: it's probably not very sensitive to be leaving out cookies for a man who famously struggles with his weight.'
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