
Strange Passage, Part One
I tell you, it really makes a man think.

Don't Mention the War
I'll be very careful, don't worry.

In Recollection of Past Mischief
I spent years working hard for the usual reason: dire financial necessity. But fortunately, my work life granted me all sorts of silly situations and moments that I, at least, found spiritually sustaining.

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I watch Fox News so I know all about the plot against Christmas. That's right: conspirators are subverting people's belief in Santa. As a small business owner, and a believer in Santa Claus (I even saw him in a shopping mall once), I make this pledge: For every 1000 boxes of Wrongcards you buy I will send you a Fox News coffee mug (possibly chipped). Christmas saved, kids.