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Ecard text: Passover is the only part of the year in which you are allowed to throw buckets of lamb's blood at people's front doors without them accusing you of being a sociopath.
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Now, I may not know anything about the world's religions but I don't like to think that it should prevent me from forming deeply held convictions on the topic. My Nanna taught me from the earliest age that only a few of us will be saved from the earth by lizard-people in flying saucers, so your guess is as good as mine. So Happy Passover (and Happy Dragon-Egg Festival, Nanna)!

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Ecard text: I think Jesus will forgive you for being Jewish. Some of his best friends were Jewish.
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Ecard text: Happy Passover. Though I'm sorry your people didn't stick around to help finish the pyramids because they turned out pretty nice in the end.
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Ecard text: You would probably receive Christmas presents as well if you did what most of us do and pretend to be Christian.
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