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Christmas ecard: I dont want you to get me a Christmas present. I want to sit there on Christmas day looking at you in disbelief that you believed that I didnt want a Christmas present. Ecard image showing: I dont want you to get me a Christmas present. I want to sit there on Christmas day looking at you in disbelief that you believed that I didnt want a Christmas present.

About This Card

Most of us have been busy practicing our Pre-Apocalypse Stop, Drop and Roll Survival Drills so that we might outlive our more ‘skeptical’ friends. I can’t wait to see the surprise on their faces when they’re strafed by Pernicious Tabby Cats in Flying Saucers, which is how I suspect the Apocalypse will pan out. I’m usually right about stuff. I’ll see you guys at the Christmas looting, ok?!
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Published on 15 Dec 2012

understanding me

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My wife does yoga to relax. See how different men and women can be? It happens to be my personal belief that yoga was invented by a woman as a way to punish men collectively for some sort of infraction — possibly for not removing a lizard from a kitchen in a sufficiently timely manner.

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latest newsletters (opens in new tab)
  1. On Tolkien, the broligarchs, and why literary education matters

    — Peter Thiel Doesn't Understand His Favorite Book

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  2. You know, in case you needed a few tips.

    — How to be (slightly) difficult

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  3. Or, how I don't want to get arrested for quoting Miss Rachel.

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I wrote a book

Book cover of 'The Harvard Skull Fiasco' showing [describe visual elements if any]

The Harvard Skull Fiasco

One heist.

Thirty-seven accomplices.

What could possibly go wrong?

Buy at Amazon (opens in new tab)
An illustration of a coffee-cup, and the text: 'buy me coffee'.

understanding me

Most of us have been busy practicing our Pre-Apocalypse Stop, Drop and Roll Survival Drills so that we might outlive our more 'skeptical' friends. I can't wait to see the surprise on their faces when they're strafed by Pernicious Tabby Cats in Flying Saucers, which is how I suspect the Apocalypse will pan out. I'm usually right about stuff. I'll see you guys at the Christmas looting, ok?!

tags:difficult, present

I dont want you to get me a Christmas present. I want to sit there on Christmas day looking at you in disbelief that you believed that I didnt want a Christmas present.

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