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Ecard text: St Nicholas was accompanied by a demon who kidnapped and ate bad little children. Look, did you want an authentic Christmas or not?
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I've seen the piles of prose penned by prominent pundits in the remainders sections of book stores; there's a Culture War raging on the streets and even Our Christmas Traditions are under attack. Well we're not here to simply offer tasteful ecards - we're here to enlighten civilization. When your Grandchildren ask: where were you during the Culture Wars? you can reply: at Wrongcards...



The Story So Far, Part I

I just disappeared for four years. It's time to come out from the woodwork, but where do I start? How about I go back to the middle?

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Ecard text: ‘Eastre’ is the Old English spelling of the name of a Germanic pagan goddess. The Christians named their most important anniversary after her.In today’s marketing language this is called co-branding.
Today is Good Friday. That's a public holiday in a lot of the world but not in the U.S., because the earliest colonists here were protestants and they got to set all the rules. When we're kicking off space exploration don't let protestants onto the space ships or there'll be no weekends on Mars. Today's card makes commercial use of religious imagery. In other words: Happy Easter!
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Hanukkah cards

Ecard text: You would probably receive Christmas presents as well if you did what most of us do and pretend to be Christian.
When I was growing up the most I knew about Jewish people was that they didnt believe in Christmas and liked to wear very small hats. Still, every year I give at least one Jewish friend a Christmas present. Its not required, of course, but cultural sensitivity is all about making others speechless with gratitude.
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Topical cards

Ecard text: We can argue all day whether or not God gets high, but I think the evidence is clear.
I never like to hear people arguing about religion because that means they're not sitting there listening attentively to me. Everyone has a different approach to religious debate. Mine is to scream: That Is Anathema! until everyone leaves. I guess it's important to win.
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Topical cards

Ecard text: Nothing brings forth the thrill of the hunt quite like opening the door to Jehovah's Witnesses.
For those among us who are religiously tolerant enough to get away with laughing at the religiously intolerant, here is today's wrongcard. For everyone else, well, I look forward to your letters.
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