Your problems are negligible, think of Charlie Sheen. If someone gave YOU a choice between nothing and two million dollars to make a show like Two and a Half Men, you'd be a complete emotional wreck as well.

The media is blitzing us with reports of uprisings in Libya, Tunisia and Egypt, but have so far ignored the tribulations of actor Charlie Sheen. He's out of work and in six months will run out of cocaine. He doesn't need our pity, he needs drugs and hookers, so take on some extra shifts and donate generously. Thank you.