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Ecard text: I’m not saying that you should teach children that the Easter Bunny is a psychotic pan-dimensional demon clown that harvests the souls of bad children with a bloodied rake. I’m saying that if you don’t you’re wasting an opportunity.
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Easter? Just a conspiracy perpetrated by a cartel of chocolate manufacturers, right? I mean, we don't own it - some pointy-hatted pontiff does. Sure we can take it back .. from the clergy, the factory-owners, the companies that market diabetes drugs. You see, anyone can change the world, provided they believe. And have billions of dollars and play tennis with Rupert Murdoch.

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"Shea is beginning to think that stealing the world's most famous skull wasn't the best way to launch his career in cat burglary..."

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From My Newsletter, June 20, 2019

I also considered throwing a chair through a window, but I didn't because it was my chair, and also my window. One should be particular when it comes to picking out targets for petty acts of vandalism.

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Ecard text: 'Society was not yet ready for what Mister Bunny and I shared together that hot complicated summer in the long grass behind my Aunt's old farm house. But looking back through the window of memory I simply recall him as he no doubt was: a sensitive yet utterly spoiled stuffed toy with an irrepressible curiosity about his body and, to my delight, my own.'
On Wednesdays I like to post an older card for the sake of nostalgia and spend the rest of the day warning people about minotaurs stealing our jobs. I'll keep doing that until Fox News finally runs a panel discussion on the subject. Then I'll just retire in sick horror.
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