Christmas Ecards

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Stare off into the distance. 'You're almost as disappointing as Norman...' 'Who is Norman, Ma?' 'Norman was a disappointment. He wasn't a devoted son either. Wanted to run off and 'live his life', whatever that means. All his poor Mother asked for was a zebra. Police never found his body.' 'I'll bring you a zebra mom, I promise.' 'You're a good boy. On your way home, pick me up a carton of cigarettes.'

Long-standing argument with my 6-year-old; she thinks Santa is real and I disagree. She thinks I'm needlessly skeptical. Interestingly, at this point I haven't bought a single Christmas present this year. I mean, there's still time for me to win this argument.

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