Don’t listen to what some people say, everyone is an optimist. Everyone is being completely optimistic - they might as well embrace the reality. Whenever I turn on the television I stare at it for eight minutes, turn it off and then have to go lie down because civilisation is clearly coming to a sticky end. But then I’m up 15 minutes later because Fox News must not win. See? Optimism. In other news, I should be a motivational speaker.