free ecards that are
wrong for every occasion
CheerUp Ecard with text: Cheer up and stop fretting about inconsequential things. Because brain aneuryisms can leave you paralyzed while you are slowly eaten by domestic cats.
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about this card: inconsequential things | Whenever people get sad I usually try to make them feel better. I talk about the brief and anonymous life of the gastrotrich, a microscopic fresh-water creature that only lives for three days. People don’t like to get sad around me.
The Harvard Skull Fiasco

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WTF Ecard with text: I have learned that if it starts yowling, it is probably only pretending to be a piñata. In which case one should stop drinking immediately.
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Mother's Day Ecard with text: Happy Mothers Day. Thank you for raising me to be someone around whom cats are very safe, no matter how amorous I might be feeling.
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Halloween Ecard with text: Every year my stupid voodoo-obsessed cat starts prophesying your death. Next time I'm getting one that's a nihilist.
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WTF Ecard with text: If I should ever wander off into the fog in my mind, lose my way and never return, I want you to have my cat. Provided I havent eaten it by then or something.
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WTF Ecard with text: 'as food prices rise, remember: there are alternative sources of white meat. And it's not as if they don't fantasize about eating us. Look - i'm just saying.'
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