Free Baby Ecard: 'Lazy and Unmotivated' | Wrongcards

Baby Ecard with text: Aside from the fact that, generally speaking, your baby has poor personal hygiene and is lazy, incoherent, unmotivated, self-absorbed, and hogging all the attention, I think the child has a lot to recommend it. — about this card: lazy and unmotivated | ‘People are always going and having babies and expecting us to give them gifts. But how can anything we give them top The Miracle of Life? Thats what I ask, but everyone says: no, no you’ve got to give them a present anyway. So I send a small bottle of rum (“for the baby”) or an ecard like this one. Anything to avoid babysitting.’

Somewhat Related Wrongcards

Baby Ecard with text: Congratulations on your pregnancy. I hope your child is born with antlers because antlers are frickin sweet and nobody is the playground is gonna mess with a child born with antlers.

Family Ecard with text: I think that if you had been an only child, you would have become lonely and tried to imagine me. And that would have become dangerous because if your imagination had summoned me, I would have wound up becoming our parents favorite again.

Apology Ecard with text: I am sorry your child is crap at drawing. SEE? the perspective is all off ...

latest newsletters

A Not So Cricketty Christmas

Some games of cricket can last for weeks. In fact, I think that's one of the reasons I moved to America.

A Not So Cricketty Christmas

Some games of cricket can last for weeks. In fact, I think that's one of the reasons I moved to America.

The Infernal Terracotta Pot

I slightly injured myself. Then, whilst forced to do nothing at all, I began to wonder about my own mental well-being.

The Infernal Terracotta Pot

I slightly injured myself. Then, whilst forced to do nothing at all, I began to wonder about my own mental well-being.

Strange Passage, Part Two

... and then I was locked up in a holding cell ...

Strange Passage, Part Two

... and then I was locked up in a holding cell ...

Strange Passage, Part One

I tell you, it really makes a man think.

Strange Passage, Part One

I tell you, it really makes a man think.

Don't Mention the War

I'll be very careful, don't worry.

Don't Mention the War

I'll be very careful, don't worry.

books by me

The Harvard Skull Fiasco Book Cover

Buy at Amazon

Rise of the Blue Bandicoot Book Cover

Buy at Amazon

The Blue Bandicoot Saga Book Cover

Buy at Amazon

The Harvard Skull Fiasco Book Cover

Shea suffers from pathological problems with authority. When he's not fixing computers in the library at Harvard Medical School, he's tormenting middle managers and feuding with his boss. But where in the Harvard employee manual does it say you have to behave perfectly at all times?