Label nazi | Reminders Ecard | WRONGCARDS

Reminders Ecard with text: If you MUST insist on being a Refrigerator Label Nazi, could you at least buy milk I would WANT to steal? — about this card: label nazi | Back when I was poor and unnourished, I lived with a guy who used to drink my milk while I slept. As a comparative ratio, based on my assets at the time, this equated roughly to stealing my car. But I never put a note on anything in the fridge. Even to me, who once suffered, a note on milk is an instruction to steal.

somewhat related wrongcards

Happy Thanksgiving Ecard with text: I am sorry I cannot attend Thanksgiving with your family but I would rather kill Nazis on a Playstation than sit with them at a dinner table.

St Patricks's Day Ecard with text: We drink to remember St Patrick's liberation of Ireland from the Nazi-Alien occupation of 1932-1956, which you would know all about if you too watched the History Channel.

Baby Shower Thank You Cards Ecard with text: Don't worry I'm happy to babysit. You can pay me in breast milk. I have a lot of pleasant associations with it.

Apology Ecard with text: i am sorry that you only seem to want to communicate when i'm busy killing Nazis.

Birthday Ecard with text: Happy Birthday, and a half finished to-do list including - remember birthday, buy milk, token gesture ecard, sharpen axe, practice looking innocent.

latest newsletters

Wrongcards and the Mind Virus

I've been revisiting some of my older cards. Some of them are inexplicable.

Wrongcards and the Mind Virus

I've been revisiting some of my older cards. Some of them are inexplicable.

A Not So Cricketty Christmas

Some games of cricket can last for weeks. In fact, I think that's one of the reasons I moved to America.

A Not So Cricketty Christmas

Some games of cricket can last for weeks. In fact, I think that's one of the reasons I moved to America.

The Infernal Terracotta Pot

I slightly injured myself. Then, whilst forced to do nothing at all, I began to wonder about my own mental well-being.

The Infernal Terracotta Pot

I slightly injured myself. Then, whilst forced to do nothing at all, I began to wonder about my own mental well-being.

Strange Passage, Part Two

And then I was locked up in a holding cell, wondering what to do next.

Strange Passage, Part Two

And then I was locked up in a holding cell, wondering what to do next.

Strange Passage, Part One

I tell you, it really makes a man think.

Strange Passage, Part One

I tell you, it really makes a man think.

books by me

The Harvard Skull Fiasco Book Cover

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Rise of the Blue Bandicoot Book Cover

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The Blue Bandicoot Saga Book Cover

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The Harvard Skull Fiasco Book Cover

Shea suffers from pathological problems with authority. When he's not fixing computers in the library at Harvard Medical School, he's tormenting middle managers and feuding with his boss. But where in the Harvard employee manual does it say you have to behave perfectly at all times?