If you think ecards and greeting cards are - at best - insipid, mass-produced tokens of insincere sentiment, then I like you. And also, welcome to Wrongcards.
On Wednesdays I like to post an older card and then spend the rest of the day going off topic. Today I'm in the Netherlands. The Dutch are a handsome people who, somewhat regrettably, like to speak gibberish. But today's card has nothing to do with Holland - what did you expect?
I'm the sort of responsible guy you could take back to your parent's trailer without police needing to get involved but that's only cause my Nanna raised me proper. I remember us sharing a tin of cat food one night and her telling me how 'chicks dig a romantic'. So fellers - take note.
Greetings from London! On Wednesdays I like to post an older card and then spend the day working as a cryptozoologist. I spent the day lurking in the shadows of Paddington Station, hoping to spot an upright walking bear believed to be from Darkest Peru. I'm not very good at cryptozoology.
Alright, today I'm getting on a plane and flying to London. I'll be there for a few days, then I go to Basel in Switzerland, and then to Amsterdam. I need you all to be good kids. This means not setting fire to anyone's sofa. There is no need to appease the God of Fire; he doesn't love you, he is toying with your affections.
Do you know anybody having a birthday this weekend? If so, this is not really the best card to send them. Unless you're giving them a completely rubbish present and you want to draw attention away from it. I once gave someone a chocolate bar wrapped up in gift paper, but that was before chocolate bars got so expensive.
On Wednesdays I like to post an older card and then spend the rest of the day serving my community. Now, you can't really save the world on your own, but what you CAN do is pick one issue or cause and focus on that. Me? I work to raise awareness of clowns. I'm just trying to make a difference.
It's voting time in the US and there have been some requests for some election coverage here. The only problem is that, well, voting is a deeply divisive issue. Some are in favor of voting, others are against, and some are in favor of voting hundreds of times. I'd only do the latter if the bloke has particularly nice hair.
A lot of men find it difficult to express themselves emotionally, but that's only because a lot of men these days don't drink a lot of whiskey. Men, it's easy to speak your mind; all you have to do is make sure nobody is home, lock the doors and whisper. I can't believe we have a reputation for being unable to communicate.
If you're new to Wrongcards you probably don't yet know that I like to invent excuses for people. I'm a creature of misadventure and when it comes to getting out of tricky situations, well, I know all about it. You may think we're an ecard site or a webcomic, but really we're a Self-Help book. Send our cards and win at life.
I was standing in the library taking photos when this librarian came up and told me to stop. "You can't take photos in the library," he said. Later, when I was looking at the photo I took of him, I decided to draw him as a zombie. It's a sad future when even librarians might be one day be zombies.
Whenever the television tells me that a zombie attack is in progress, I stay calm. I lock up the house and fill the bath tub with water, but I stay calm. You ever notice how everyone has a lot of relationship stuff to talk through when they're fighting zombies? This is why zombies are so unnerving.
Yesterday I went to a cafe in Watertown, MA, and there was a guy there wearing spandex who was staring at me suspiciously. I was worried until I realized that other people could see him too. So today's card is obviously a Public Service Announcement. You know ... if I wasn't saving the world I'd probably go mad.